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THE DREAM JOURNAL
OF L. CARUANA

      My painting The Sacrifice was inspired by a mixture of dreams and memories. Two of those dreams are recounted here. The first is represented more or less directly on the right side of the painting (see images below for details). The second inspired the idea of placing four statues on the altar, though these statues differed from those in the dream.


MY FATHER HAS THE KEY TO ENTER HERE
Munich, Sepember 12, 1994


      Last night, I dreamt that my girlfriend and I are walking towards Mnajdra, the megalithic temple in Malta, because an addition is about to be made to the temple, and this concerns me very much. Someone has told me that an arch is going to be built from the Baroque / Byzantine church which stands in one half of the temple to the other remaining half of the original temple. (In reality, there is no such church in the temple). This way, 'all will be more secure'.
      We walk along the barren road which has many rocks jutting out of the hard earth, like the vertebrae of some dinosaur.
      We come to the temple / church complex, but it is not
Mnajdra. Then I remember that one has to pass the Hagar Qim temple before reaching Mnajdra. So, this must be Hagar Qim. I look up and admire the ancient beauty of the temple.
      It is built onto a hill, and here, an aging church was also built right onto the massive stones of the Neolithic temple. Traditionally, these temples were built symmetrically with rounded apses of decreasing size on either side of the central nave. The Christian church was built onto the apse of one side of the Neolithic temple, while the other apse was left free and open to the elements.
      The church has an octagonal dome in the Maltese Baroque style, but also possesses Byzantine features, and gives me the impression of being more than a thousand years old. I can see that, in this architectural complex as well, an arch is needed between the Great Goddess and the Christian ages of architecture.
      My girlfriend and I come upon a very old Mediaeval gate of stylized wrought-iron set into a stone arch. She turns to me and says mysteriously,
"My father has the key to enter here." She then produces a long slender key, and we pass through the gate, ascending a winding path of steps.
      We find ourselves in a church that is empty and abandoned. Exploring it a bit, I find hundreds of black iron frames with inset stained or painted glass. They are leaning against one another, and propped against the wall. I start going through these, thinking that they must have once been the windows of this church. Most have black patterns forming the border, but none have what I'm looking for, which is an image at the centre.
      My girlfriend starts to get impatient
(as is often the case when we are in a bookstore, and I desparately try to look at all the books on the shelves before she insists that we leave). So, I let the windows go, and I'm prepared to accompany her wherever it is that she wants to go next.
      I have the feeling that we won't get to see the
Mnajdra temple, because she is too impatient and just not interested. Really, our interests are not the same at all. And there is always this uncomfortable distance between us.
      Then, I notice
two kittens playing among the ruins of the church. My heart warms to the way they roll over each other playfully. They both see a little winged creature, and go bounding up the steps after it. I feel so attracted and amused by these two little kittens.
      But my girlfriend doesn't care about them, and is already walking towards the exit.

      The dream ends.



THE DREAM GATE AND THE STAIRS LEADING TO THE MNAJDRA TEMPLE / CHAPEL


STATUES FROM THE END OF THE WORLD
Munich, May 9, 1994


      Last night, I dreamt that it was the end of the world.
      People were leaving the cities in a massive exodus. I was one of them, but I stopped suddenly because I noticed that someone had thrown out some
ancient sculptures which I thought were very valuable.
      I went through the garbage can, and dug out a beautiful stone sculpture -
primitive, with wide massive features, like the totems of Mexico or the West Coast Indians.
      There were more sculptures, of different types. One was made of wood, and was like the
Morris Dancers which I saw on display in the Stadtsmuseum here in Munich: a mediaeval figure, like a jester or fool, dancing slyly and artfully.
       I notice that I have a bag with me, so I start putting the statues in my bag. Other people are now gathering around the garbage can, as they too want to take some of the valuable statues. A woman is about to reach for one when I take it first.
      But, this statue doesn't appeal to me at all, as its very kitschy and sentimental. So, I put it back and she takes it.
      Then I take another statue, and it is
a small white bust of a historical figure, like Napoleon or Beethoven.
       I look in my bag, and I can see the statues all arranged, even with cloth between them to protect them.

      Then I wake up.



FOUR STATUES ON THE ALTAR

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